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BREAKING: Holiday Spirit Savagely Murdered By Winter Term

Murdered Holiday Spirit

Eugene, OR — Bringer of cheer and friend to all, Holiday Spirit, was murdered early this morning, according to Lane County coroner’s records. Holiday Spirit was only 38 days old. Investigative reports show that notable thug Winter Term, along with accomplices who go by street names Syllabus and i<Clicker, forced their way into Holiday Spirit’s…

Students Starting To Organize Study Groups They Never Plan On Attending

Students point to a day that works for none of them.

Eugene, OR — With fall term finals approaching, many students are beginning to commit to several study groups with classmates that they will inevitably ditch. “I usually just smile and tell my groups, ‘I’m so down,’ and it’s really quite easy to back out after saying that,” junior business major Becky Munch said. Many students…