Brandsome

Sigma Alpha Epsilon Brothers Are Misunderstood Gentlemen And Scholars

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Sigma Alpha Epsilon (SAE) is a modern day Animal House—full of completely misunderstood gentlemen and scholars. For example, take the recent changes to their property, specifically the parking lot. Many people think they lost their privilege to park at their lot because they are all belligerent drunk assholes who take advantage of women, disregard authorities…

5 Things You Need To Know To Save Your ASUO Campaign

The Ducks Like You slate complains about rent to a number of passing students.

1. Everyone Loves Underdogs This year it seems that each slate thinks it is a front-runner. Mighty Oregon, the elitists; Ducks Like You, pretending they aren’t elitists; and Fresh Start Oregon, the campaign that thinks UO sucks and wants to end everything we have come to know. With all of these intimidation titles, the only…

Top 5 Places To Poop On Campus

(Photos by Brandsome.)

Eugene, OR — As of last Friday, I can proudly say that I have dropped a deuce in every restroom on campus. My friends have given me the nickname Scat Superior, but I would go as far as to say that I am the leading poop expert at this university. While I have casually met…

Tip: IT’S FUCKING COLD

Coats. Wear them. (Photo by Brandsome.)

According to the National Weather Service, a Winter Storm Watch for snow freezing and fucking cold weather is in effect until sometime Friday morning. So here are the best ways to fight this Frozen-loving Mother Nature of ours. Drink lots of alcohol. While tests say alcohol just makes you feel warmer and not actually warmer,…